Once in a while, you hear something on the news that stops you dead in your tracks. Today, as I drove in to County Hall, I thought I was hearing things.
I must have been mistaken. I thought for one mad second that Simon Cowell of "Pop Idol" fame had demanded that local councils up and down the country scrap their parking restrictions so that he could put his shiny black Rolls Royce right outside the door of whatever auditorium he travels to to 'judge' would be popstars.
In an interesting variation on the disabled Blue Badge scheme, Mr Cowell suffers from two serious conditions. Firstly, he needs to be right outside the front door "in case he gets mobbed" by adoring crowds. Secondly, and far more simply, he "hates walking anywhere".
Indeed, one council has apparently ripped out a series of bollards so he can park on the pavement outside one stage door.
Enough, already. In a world of assumed self-importance, this has to be right up there in the First Division. And local government appears to be pandering to Mr Cowell's ego.
Can we all just pinch ourselves?